this is for sister faith, who I promised to write something for, its on the fly so pardon the grammer & now,
The totally True story of Binary Gigglin Mike
I met mike at cal state in the early 80's, at a party in the dorms. He didn't say much and I was more interested in opposite chromosones. During the course of the evening, I asked him to toss me a beer, he smiled said "buds" and threw me a beer. I thought it odd, but hell we were all pretty lubricated by then.
A little later a Girl asked Mike if he had any weed, "no buds" was the reply with a frown. Curiouser and curiouser. As I was about to leave, alone, unfortunately, I saw mike, sitting in the corner just giggling, the world was just a funny place. At the time I assumed it was chemically induced, I was wrong.
Nobody knew where mike came from, he just appeared that semester. Nobody knew where he stayed, we just saw him on campus, he'd crash in the dorms with friends sometimes, and we'd sneak him into the commons for meals when we could. He'd disappear for a day or so and come back cleaned up with fresh clothes, but where he went or how he got there, we never knew. I don't think he ever worked, I'm pretty sure he couldn't hold down a job, with his vocabulary restrictions. Most of the time mike just hung out drinking budwieser, smoking marlboro reds and spleef on occaison. He never did any other drugs or drank hard liqour. Sometimes he had money, sometimes weed but he was usually broke. We kinda of adopted him as our unofficial party mascot.
In the 2yrs I knew mike, I never heard him utter more than two words, "buds" and "no buds", thats all he seemed to need to get through life, buds was good, no buds was bad. Simple, being computer science majors he was soon dubbed binary mike. Everytime we'd have a party mike would get a beer sit in the corner and giggle, mike was happy, which is a rare and wonderful thing. Hence the giggling mike. After a couple of months he just became "binary gigglin mike", there was a party at the dorms one night and a couple of jocks were there. One of them started getting pissed at mike, he was just sitting in the corner drinking his bud and giggling. This jock was taking it personal, he went over and grabbed mike by the shirt and started yelling at him. All we heard was mike yelling "NO BUDS, No buds" we all ran over and got the jock off him,
"whats going on?",
"he's laughing at me"
"Mike laughs at everybody, get over it"
mike went back to his corner and in about 10 minutes he was giggling again.
We knew his name was mike, because it was the only word anyone ever saw him write, we think he could read, but with mike's lifestyle it was irrelevant. He could put so much inflection into "buds" and "no buds" that with a little beer and smoke in ya, you could have complete conversations with him. I saw him one time at a party and a girl kept looking at him, we naturally wired him up, "mike, she's looking at you, go talk to her." It took awhile, but we finally got him to go over to her.
Mike bashfully walks up to her "Buds??" questioning
Her "what?"
"Buds?!" more forcefully
"your kind of cute, are you on acid?"
"No Buds"
"oh, do you have a cigerette?"
"buds" gives her a smoke and lights it
"So do you go to school here?"
"no buds"
"whats your name?"
he looks around at us for help "no buds?"
"mike" we yell, "his name is mike"
"buds, buds, buds"
"ok, umm mike, want to go get some more beer?"
"Buds!"
That was when we got to see, mikes motorcycle, it was an old green Kawasaki KZ400, we all walked out to the parking lot, I was the only one with a car, and waited to see if they were going to split on the bike. Mike just looked at it, head down "no buds".
"mike, does your motorcycle run?"
"no buds"
"do you want me to run you to the store for beer?
"Buds!"
So we all pile into my 66 coupe de ville and get more beer. Meanwhile mikes in the back seat making out with his new friend, coming up for air and sighing "buuddds" every now and then.
The party was a success and after a busy night together there was a mutual parting of the ways, and mike was single again.
The motorcycle never ran. We don't know how he got it into the dorm parking lot, but it didn't stay, he would push it over to a dorm where a party was going on, and party, if everyone was in class or busy he'd push it around campus and park it in various places. Mike had his own criteria for where inoperable motorcycles should be parked. What they were I couldn't even begin to speculate. He could get pretty creative with it, I found in the bathroom on the second floor of a dorm one time. I don't know how he got it there or got it down. No one ever saw him, unless he was pushing it on the sidewalk or in a parking lot. He'd sit on it, smoking outside the dorms, waiting for someone to keep him company. He'd wash it occaisionally on the weekends. Once someone slashed his tires, (heartless prick), we all chipped in and bought him new tires, Smiling and repeating his mantra "buds, buds, buds" while we put them on for him. One of our number came from a well off family and offered to fix the bike for him,
"no buds", we don't know if it was because he couldn't bear to part with it for the 2 weeks it would be in the shop, or if he was afraid it really would run, but he didn't want it fixed.
This went on for 2yrs, until I left, I never saw mike again, but I like to imagine he's still back on campus
cadging beers and pushing his motorcycle around. Its nice to know that somewhere out there is some one, perfectly satisfied with life, that see's it for the humorous interlude it is, and is totally happy.
and that is the totally true story of binary gigglin mike.
if your out there mike "Buds"
Subject: Odd Writing 
Tue Apr 08, 2008 9:21 am
That's totally awesome, man! I about fell off the floor...uh...wait...no, I mean, I about fell off the ceiling...no wait, that's not right either.... I mean....BUDS!!! 
